celebrating 200 days away. we got a little lost… but where better than here, with friends like these? north shore. oahu, hawaii.
there’s something in the air. a change. an eeriness. an energy i can feel and sense and taste.
a hurricane is coming. well, two hurricanes are coming. i feel nervous, a little scared. a little worried, sure. but part of me feels like it’ll pass without a worry, in this bubble of paradise and perfection. it’s like the winds i’m feeling and hearing right now, i’ve felt and heard before. but this seems different. because we know what’s coming. we can see it: on radars and weather channels, on news reports from near and far; in the closing of businesses, the empty shelves where bottled water is usually stocked; in the eyes of people, so nervous, so over-prepared. so intensified by the emotions and paranoia of the locals and the media and the tourists. it saturates the island air.
there is so much going on, in all the people on the island where i’ve kept my heart for the best part of this year. i can feel it. vibrating, pulsating, echoing against the walls of fear built around homes of weatherboard and plaster. on the coast, waiting for the storm. waiting for the rain. waiting for the wind and floods and chaos. waiting for the damage and the fallout and the disaster and the worst.
well what pointless waiting that will be.
weather the storm. it’s wild and wickedly yelling all its secrets in spurts of showers, sun and empty sky. for now.
and it raced through the millions of roadways and rivers and crevasses and mountains
and it lay down next to me on a mattress made of memories made of yesterdays and who-knows-when’s
i’m too ready
we were separated
by salt water
by space and air
by the centre console of his car.
but we remembered – we never were very good at keeping friends with any of that space between.
there’s a natural filter here, he said, if you don’t move with the flow, follow the pace, remove the struggle and find your place within the entirety of the fluidity, you won’t find the magic. you won’t feel the energy. you won’t find open doors to open air and open hearts, you know, they’re everywhere.
there’s a finality to my days now. things are blossoming and things are closing, just how they should. just how i feel is right. there’s a bigger sense of being, a more enormous feeling of living, on this island soaked in salt water mystery.
the wind whips against my skin, coiling across the universe, leaving me in seconds of stillness to breathe and dream and wonder.
forever isn’t so long.