soon this beach will be scattered with people but for now i have it just to myself. just me some birds some flies some wind, the sand the sea some trees and shells.
what i put out i get right back, so my energy wanes and explodes maybe where it’s not supposed to. i take a step the other way and recognise that day-to-day i should find something stronger. something less of an option and prioritise the heart that needs above the heart that wants.
yesterday they all reached out. yesterday home was on my mind. yesterday i needed them and they needed me and we needed each other so we found each other, like we know we can.
it’s early it’s morning i sit by the sea watching ripples and blueness and whitewash and waves [they don’t compare to the waves i left].
and i think.
until now i’d never seen hawaii in the summertime. i’d never felt the pull of the sun so high in such a blue sky. the power the vibes the heat.
i need to change my focus.
and everything is just how it’s meant to be. the connection to the world. me, my breath, the wind and the earth. you, and your breath, the sky and the sea.
everything is perfect. everything is love. everything is free.
don’t forget your heart. its beat marks a map to the scattered constellations of your universe. the stories, the wisdom, the lessons of life. each star a voice, a moment. space. ever-changing. full of dreams just waiting to be chased.
so don’t forget your heart. it may speak quietly, but love lives in the whispers. in midnight conversations. in the space halfway between staring eyes. the answers are always closer than you think. simply, from your head, to your heart.
and just let it be.
unfamiliarity doesn’t hide here.
here hides lies. here hides places filled with spaces left by truth kept locked inside.
it seems to run in cycles. and i’m caught right up again. but, if i know it like i think, these cycles always end. so, i’ll wait. give it time. until i feel it doesn’t matter so much.
at least not anymore.
i know it’s what i do, but it’s hard to break a habit so intrinsic, so ingrained.
i’ll know myself better, someday soon.
the same day i stop telling myself so many ridiculous lies.