i desperately wanted to fall in love with him again. to be able to tell him i felt it too. he said everything i ever dreamed of hearing. but i couldn’t say it back.
i thought i just needed time. time to get over what he did to me. time to fall back into that feeling. time to grow in love.
my eyes blurred with tears as i felt blindly with my thumbs, searching for the letters.
time wasn’t enough, for him, for me. i hurt him and that kills me, i never meant for that to happen. i crossed my heart and i promised him. i care about him more than i can say. i wish i could have been that person, to offer him everything and throw every part of my heart, my soul, my entire being into it, for it to become my only reason for living.
too much held me back. maybe i should’ve told him sooner. but i just couldn’t stand the idea of losing the thing i once wanted more than anything else in the world.
if only you knew how deeply sorry i am.