when i was little, i used to think my toys came to life at night, while i slept. sometimes, i would try and trick them and lay as still as i could so i might catch them talking to one another or sneaking around. i remember it vividly.
today, i went to the ballet. i saw the nutcracker. i forgot how much i loved the story. it reminded me of being young and the days when my toys came to life. i know they did. sneaky toys.
i sat and smiled at the magic.
and it made me physically nostalgic about my dancing days. a yearning. a pining. a heartache for what i have missed. what i could have been. something i loved, still love, is something that i might have given up too soon.
i stopped dancing seriously when i was 12. i followed my favourite teacher to a studio she started and i kept dancing for fun. since i was two, there hasn’t been a year i haven’t done some sort of dance. so watching the nutcracker today made me itch. oh how i long to dance like that again.