no more sleeps

so even though i hadn’t yet thought about it, i never expected it to be like this. this, i have never experienced before. never even come close. 

“it’s tuesday again, mum,” said a little boy when we landed.

and so here we go.

i am so overwhelmed with everything. mostly stemming from the jet lag no doubt. i said i was willing to go with the flow, so i will. sitting in airports didn’t help when i started second guessing what i am doing, what i was about to embark on. i had to tell myself to keep an open mind. you made this decision for a reason, natalie. don’t doubt yourself now. i guess i won’t know if it’s the right thing until after it’s done. things are funny like that. 

tiana met me at the airport with a lei of purple and white, smelling sweetly and resting spongily around my neck. the smell filled the car. driving away from the airport, a rush of absolute disbelief came over me. seriously, i can’t be here, this isn’t real. it was too much. the massive mountain face gradually met the road that swerved it’s way along a coastline of sand and sea – so blue in the deep, aqua in the shallows. islands in the distance, resting in grandeur. green trees shadowed the road, contrasting with arid land on the mountains, light brown. cows grazed lazily. sugar cane blew easily in the wind, quite calm for the valley isle. 

reggae on the radio.

for the next three months i’ll be living in a little four-walled shanty type house, maybe 3×3. you climb a bamboo ladder to get into the roof space where there is another level with a bed. it’s not very big. but, it seems very maui. bob marley hangs on the walls with pictures and memories and posters advertising surfing competitions. everything is so relaxed here. different.

i napped on the beach today. i lay in the sun and felt it warm on my skin. it didn’t pierce me like it does in australia. just a wave of warmth pulsing across my skin, dusted with sticky sand when the wind blew. the ocean is warm. i burned the soles of my feet on the concrete, too hot. but, i won’t complain. i’ll just wear shoes.

so, as i sit in the kitchen in the main part of the house, i’m a little nostalgic, i guess. but this day, my second tuesday in a row, i wouldn’t change. i need to sleep off this jet lag and wake with a clear head. what am i doing? 

i’ll figure it out.


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